Reason

sometimes i wonder what is the reason God put me in this world for ..

to be a corporate slave that is stuck between office politics?
to be a failure in life that even the only thing i want is the only thing i couldn't have?
to be sorry for myself all the time like what i am doing now?

i know i shouldn't feel that way. i have so many blessings bestowed upon me already. its just happened that the two big projects happened at the same time and its a one man show. but ..
do you think they will look back into all these and reward me good? i don't think so.
not working, is that an option? definitely no ...

i am SO depressed now; when people turn suicidal i'll just turn into a cry baby.
every dark cloud has its silver lining; i'm just waiting for mine ...