Musical Week

from country music to pop to 'mid-life crisis' to classical music. the last one was simply because my friend is one of the cello-ist. well she's more like a bassist and the cello-ist for this particular performance. a nice weekend indeed.
and now my brain is full of that funny song from saturday .. 'don't mess with my tut tut'

Few Minutes to Kill

it's been a blessful saturday so far.
woke up and managed to reach the institute just in time. yupe, went for an 'interview' this morning. it was an interesting one. all my certificates and stuff are not as important as the fact that i am a native bahasa speaker. of course LAH!! it's for a basic conversation in bahasa, eh. well it's all started from an email about a girl looking for a bahasa speaker. i contacted her hoping that this is some sort of language exchange thingy. but when she told me it is for a proper training i was like errkk .. but no harm trying, eh. and so i did. the class will start mid-october and they will get back to me on the schedule and material outline. now i'm wondering if i really want to commit myself to it! lol - let's just see how it goes i guess.
weather is great. well i hope it stays this way and not turning to a scorching hot saturday like last week. i was literally jumping in the court 'cos the sand was like burning your feet. won't be staying late anyway, with me fasting and stuff. 2 hours should be enough for me.
it 'll definitely be an interesting day as well 'cos this will be my 1st time showering and praying at my friend's who find this fasting praying stuff amusing. it's always nice to share information with people who don't know. and it's just heart warming to face the fact that people don't judge each other based on religion, race, gender, and social status.
better log off now...

My Sahur

more than half of ramadhan has passed.
the 1st 4 days observing it with mum was good - i never miss my morning meal
missed it once only to find out that i had to break my fast 3 hrs before the time :\
already missed 9 days which was actually good as it means i won't miss the eid prayer this time around after missing it for like 3 or 4 years in a row
so it's been 3 days since i started fasting again. of course that means 3 days has passed without a morning meal. as usual, the 5 minutes became 15 mins and i normally woke up either 5 mins or 30 mins past the time.
so today i eat early, in fact i'm eating while i'm writing this. the later you have your morning meal the better it is, but i'm just taking precautious man. it's a long tough day i'll be facing later....

This Red Dot

it is a known fact on how efficient singapore government is, but somehow it still amaze me.
why? here are some of my personal experience:

• went to ICA during lunch time to get my multiple re-entry stamp transferred to a new one. left the office 45 mins earlier to get this settled. well, it only takes 10 mins to do so. i didn't bring my card, and if it happens back home they will ask me to come back with the card. but here? 'if you look at your card, there's your old passport number. next time bring and get it change okay'. i still got the stamp transferred
• my sister received a letter from the government. it's regarding my nephew - a citizen born between 2001 and 2002 which means he has to commence primary one in 2008. but there's no information that my nephew has registered to any school, hence the letter. if there's another arrangement done for him, we have to report it - including the name and address of the school, if he's residing oversea. you see!! they keep track of education
• few months back my sister received another letter from the government. she has 2 kids who are citizen and yet she hasn't apply for the baby bonus scheme. she was then requested to submit the birth certs of her kids to be processed for it. they even keep track when you haven't claim your right *read:money* as a citizen

if all these are not efficiency, enlighten me.

Ready .. Get Set ..

online visa application - paid. approved. *very fast*
budget airline - confirmed. paid.
hostel - reserved. US$15/day!!! confirmed.

still 1.5 months away but everything is settled for my own peace of mind.
no turning back.
solo. backpacking! that's all i can say now. yess!!

Si Hitam

my sister better not know about this blog with me calling her daughter that.
finally a picture. my 1-mth old niece. nazeera(nazira?) khairani. petite girl with high nose.
well , at least there won't be any suspicion that i'm a maid when i carry you eh, we share the same skin tone.
few more days before i see you in real life ya.. can't wait!

Money Talk

blimming 400ish phone bill - paid
new balance real run - paid
music in the park - paid
dan:s - paid
ticket home (yesss) - paid

and i'm still thinking of black eyed peas and linkin park!!!!
well, i am officially b.r.o.k.e next month ...

Priorities

a friend is having a difficult time deciding what she's going to do. what she has to sacrifice. family-work-life balance.
it's easy for me to tell her where her priorities should lie but after talking more about it i can't help but wonder too. what if it happens to me. i always said that my priorities will always be my family, but ...

• how many times have i postponed/cancelled my weekend trip home just because there's something going on in this tiny red dot?
• how many times have i been in a situation where i am physically there but my mind is wandering to another place?
• how many times did i do things half and half just so that i can be with friends but still doing my part as a relatives?
• how many times i pled mum to skip whatever not-so-important relative thingy she wanted me to attend just so that i can do other activities?

yes i have my priorities straight when it comes to important matters, but i have to admit that sometimes there's a small part of me wishing i'd be somewhere else.
when it comes to a matter of life and death the answer is simple. you might not even have to choose an option 'cos you might have none.
but what if it isn't? something for me to ponder...

Mooncakes

me and two workmates took 1/2 day leave today to make mooncakes together. we've been planning on baking/cooking something for ages without any actions, so we decided just to take leave and really do it. the event took place at my flat as it's empty and to ensure the halality (is there such word??) of the equipments.

went to get our stuff at the nearby shop and at the same time we asked on how to make durian and chocolate one as well. the lady was very kind that not only she gave us the tips, she gave us recipes as well.

once home, we started with the normal one - snow skin with white lotus paste. while the two mix the dough, my job is to make the durian paste. of course no one knows how to really do it and the lady simply said its tedious but we wanted to try. the chocolate turns out to be errr.. chocolate! what i had in mind is those hotel like snow skin with the chocolate filling. but what the lady told us was chocolate mooncake! one of us was simply speechless staring at the dark dough saying never had she see a black mooncake before. well, it's all done that we just continue doing so. the durian paste was not thick enough that we mixed it with the lotus paste to make it more easy to mold. at the end we only made 1 big snow skin with durian filling. we ate the durian paste straight from the pan so as not to waste it.

it was fun. a bit boring when it was time to mold things that we took 10 mins break before doing the 2nd batch. but it is surely interesting.

each of us had like what? 30ish mooncakes? - my friends will definitely be my victims.

Superb

i was happy that my suggestion works wonders.
and that surprise look is simply priceless. oh yeah!

A Million Thanks

thanks for listening about my failed attempt in the loo.
thanks for reading whatever i wrote on msn, for the whys and for letting me share my thoughts and feelings.
thanks for reading and replying my email. the thought of you reading it as soon as i pressed the 'send' button instantly made me feel lighter.
thanks for the ears. for the eyes. for the fingers. for being a friend.
it's just wonderful to know some of you guys can be counted on, to have the feelings reciprocated.
and of course thanks mum for being at home when i called. listening to your voice does wonders as always.
i am back in high spirit now from all the comments i received from msn and emails, and the best one will be:
aiyooooo you and your imagination, why don’t you start picturing the window cleaning guys brushing/washing window, with 6 packs, having a cold icy diet coke
you guys are simply the best!! *muacks*

Yes, I Can!!

If you only do what you can do, you never do very much.
a good quote that i should chant again and again, hoping it could remove all the uncertainties clouding my mind, ease the butterflies in my stomach.
its been 2 days already...

Go For It

it's never too late to realise what's important in your life. to fight for it
- premonition, 2007

$60

is what i need to cork out to enter my own bedroom about 30 mins ago.
argh! the price of carelessness

Worst Movie Ever Made

the official worst movie i ever watch :- belahan jiwa.
no story line. eerie background sound for nothing. trying to mix all in one. bahasa-english-mandarin. can't say low budget as they use expensive actors but idea wise is definitely taken from the gutter. and the reason i continue watching is simply because i want to know how the ending is.
si jampang pakai cutbrai, si abang sudah goodbye.

updated at 10.20 pm:
apparently some comment said the story is almost similar to sidney sheldon's book. if it is meant to be what the comments said, then it is good. too bad part 10 is missing, so i am still left confused. let me have my own scenario for the ending.

Alone Again ...

it all started with me waking up late to send mum to airport. my uncle was supposed to fetch us at 9.30 so i literally jumped off bed when he called at 9.10 saying that he's downstairs. after rushing myself we went down. i knew mum would be in trouble as soon as i carried her luggages. and of course i am right - overweight by 12 kgs, that is after them giving mum 5kgs extra. she wanted to pay the $84 charges but we said no. come on, the bag is loaded wih 15 packs of briyanis with a separate pack of chicken and beef masalas and dalchas. 15 because she wants to give some to people. i don't think it's that worth it,eh.
so, we moved to one corner and started to do unpacking. blimmey, luckily it's early in the morning that the airport isn't that crowded. took 3 briyanis, masalas, and dalchas out. moved few dalcas to the hand carry. went to weighing machine to check. 8 more kgs to go. took out few other stuff including the mop cloths and the mop handler (yeah! mop handler - stainless steel she said, so that the maid can't break it however rough they are) and then we went back for check-in. this time around somehow one of the luggage was tilted so i guess its not really weighed correctly but its green light. phew.
after everything is ready and mum's about to go in she remembered about the indian mee goreng for my sis. my auntie started smelling each pack of the briyani we took out. another round of chaos when she said 'this is mee'. i immediately opened the hand carry thinking of substituing one of the packet when another auntie said 'no need, no need, it's briyani' after opening the pack. geez.
continued the day with doing some shopping - ikea, courts, shengsiong. it was fun. i was supposed to do VB for 2 hrs, i told them that i'd be there at 2 'til 4 but somehow i realised spending time with my families is much more important than doing vb. afterall, vb will always be there. texted my friend who still insisted on me going afterwards, but i firmly said no. it was a tiring yet fun time indeed. my uncle told me to go to their place to break my fast instead of doing it alone, and my auntie reminded me that again and again. thanks for sweet invitation. will do it one of these days!
mum called during our time together saying that all the dalchas were taken away. shxt! we forgotten about carrying liquid. she tried to negotiate with the indian guy and was totally annoyed when the guy took it and throw it straight into the bin. knowing mum, i'm sure that guy didn't go off easily though mum said she told that guy to think what would eating briyani be without dalcha, since he's indian. well at least the masalas are still there so there's still some.
what a day. chaotic to begin with but ends up nice.

When Will It Be Me?

+ hey, hot gossiph direct from boss. cm resigned. apparently she got a job 1 station away from her place with a better prospect. keep to yourself and act surprised when you know ya, hehe.
- huh? is boss getting a replacement?
+ unlikely 'cos we just talked about it. she said cm hasn't do much, and what she does mostly are small application or being our backup. she's trying to get some justification about getting a new one. she said no point getting one who will leave in a years time. she tapped my shoulder saying 'more job for you my dear'. sigh
- ic. so hows the job distribution?
+ update you on monday. boss said with her current pay it's easy for her to move to other places, but not sure if they will close eyes if she comes late and go home early for the kids like she did here but apparently her future boss is from china so no communication problem for her lah. hehe
- do you realised we're the one talking about leaving but yet she's the one leaving 1st?

she is absolutely right.
sigh ...

Comfy

hey, i know it's fasting month and you're breaking fast with your families. but could you join us afterwards? we're not heading anywhere, just chilling out with cakes and board games. you've already missed last week, eh.

with that kinda statement, can i say no?

so after breaking fast with 40!! relatives (a lot of people were rejected due to lack of space thanks to us), basically a token of appreciation from the groom's mom for those who helped make the wedding a smooth one, i went home and did all my stuff.
left home at 9ish for a lovely time.
jenga. cakes. 'whiz boing bounce bang'.'fuzzy duck ducky fuzz'.'the word game'. and all sorts of silly uni games i know nuts about. loser eats the cake. memories of wedding in mykano island. maldives for honeymoon. stories. gossiph. experience. laughs. another round of 'whiz boing bounce bang tango' now that we're better at it the rule increased.

thanks for a lovely start for my weekend.

My Cab Ride

i started the day with a smile on my face, thanks to the pck-like taxi driver. from his greeting even before i even sat in the car, to his comment about all those new cars causing the traffic, his laughs, and him using 'many many' in almost all of his sentences. i can't help myself but laughed with him. just listening to him laughed made me wanted to laugh. of course, the usual complain about how all the money goes to government was there. there was once that i knew he's trying to control his laugh so i commented on his story and he finally laughed out loud.
before alighting i asked him the one question that's been in my mind since i boarded his car - 'uncle, you perm your hair ya?'
if only all taxi drivers are like that ...

During Break

watching today's back to back episodes gave me and a friend something to talk about. fall in love with a rich dying guy. look at izzie - a blimming US$8,700,000!!!!
so we're doing awol tomorrow heading to hospitals - cardio division. i'll do gleneagles she'll do raffles.
hahaha stupidly insane-nothing else to do-shallow girls.

On the Eve of Ramadhan

Since I understood four things, I have discarded all other knowledge.
First, that my daily sustenance has already been apportioned to me and will neither increase nor decrease by my futile efforts, so I strive to increase it no more.
Second, I alone and no one else can atone from my sins, so I devote myself to the Lord.
Third, I know that I will never be able to escape death, which is in our pursuit, so I have prepared myself to meet him.
Fourth, I know that God is observing me; therefore I refrain from doing what I must not do.
-Hatim al-Asamm, "The Kashf al-Mahjub"

thank You for giving me another chance to experience the joy of ramadhan again.

my silent prayer for those people affected by the earthquake. please let not be a tsunami or another earthquake so that they can observe the holy month in peace.

Random ...

my grandma is old. she likes to cook vegetables and onions. she
likes to water the plants. she likes to pray in maghrib. she sleeps at 8
o'clock. now she is in singapore

lol. mum can only protest silently when my sis called us to tell us about the write-ups my nephew did for his school assignment on grandmothers. somehow he wrote things that he dislikes - mum cooking with loads of veggies and onions, and mum asking him to switch off tv during prayer time.
2nd time mum being condemn in writings. the 1st one was during my sister's day where she chose the title 'mak saya garang macam harimau' for her malay class. poor mum
--
went to combat earlier where i gave my all. prior to that i spent merely 5 mins on the cross-trainer and i sweat like mad. i know this might be a warning from my body but i still go for combat. by the 3rd track i've down 3/4 of the water i have and i simply follow the moves during the last track - all the shouting during muaythai made me tired. skipped the conditioning as i don't think i can handle even a single push-ups.
now i feel sore all over, and only from a week off the gym. i wonder how long do i need to get back to my old stamina. and oh, 58 kgs now - instead of losing some, i gained 2 kgs more.
--
feel so tired today. shivering all over, i decided to go straight to sleep without doing my night ritual. and now i'm feeling a 'lil warm even when the aircon is on. slightly nausea as well. a sign i will fall sick if i don't take care of myself better. too much late nights and lack of rest i reckon. been doing this for months now and i guess the wedding kinda make my body screams 'enough'.
can't sleep now, hopefully i'm okay tomorrow. can't afford doing a sickie with piles of works i have. the project has been delayed for a week and i promised myself to deliver it by end of this week.
i've been trying to do the proper documentation for all the applications we have. been chasing everyone to submit the info and now when everyone have done so, i don't have time to compile it. and to top that up, my application that has been handed over to a colleague years ago is being chosen to be audited. the girl is on maternity leave that i have to take it over.
shxt, now i remember that i got a report due tomorrow and i know nuts on how to do it!!!
murphy's law playing its trick on me. anyways ...
--
2 more days to fasting month, yay. mum is around for the 1st 3 days so i have to forgo the idea of planning a diet meal this week. that incident where i fainted in the mrt after 2 hrs of gym during fasting month still lingers in their mind that i have to ensure them i have proper meal during fasting month.
oh, since we're on that topic i think it's a good opportunity for me to ask forgiveness from fellow bloggers - those that came here by accident, those that read this post or any other post. in case there is some post that offended you i apologies. everything written here is simply what i had in mind at that particular time and my thoughts/view of certain things that happen around me. nothing more, nothing less - surely no harmful meaning at all.
--
still hook on facebook, think i'll stop my rambling and go there instead. nite nite.

Family United

its been a hectic but awesomely great weekend. another family gathering. another cousin off the market :). poor nephew of fine is totally flat from the 2 days event. he was a paige boy that he had to accompany wherever the couple go. he must be more exhausted compared to us.

interesting wedding if i have to say so myself. everything was in black and white and a little red. even the wedding cake is black! the nikah was done downstairs where the girl sat at the stage while the guy performed the ijab kabul. this is the 1st time our family had it done downstairs. few chinese passerbys stopped to observe the event. i guess they find it interesting because all these while they only see the celebration, but never a religious ceremony done in public. the man who married them was the same man who married my aunties and uncles, so few of them were like reminiscing the old days ;)

done with nikah, came berinai. since berinai is more like an indian culture and the girl is malay, somehow it became more like our family event. it was fun when we play prank with my cousin, throwing all the stuff at him instead of around him. i put more henna on his palm compared to what i put on the girl's. we didn't know what to do with the egg so some of us put it on their forehead while the other asked them to kiss it, haha.

went home feeling tired but anxiously waiting for the next day's celebration. with live band and families around - what else can you ask for.
the ceremony itself was today. tiring but fun. pretty interesting wedding cake - all in black! they couple came followed by those typical malay wedding style - kompang, silat, and some dance *can't recall the name*. then off they went for some photoshoot. came back in kebaya and we're all entertained by bollywood dance. after having their late lunch and stuff they went back up and the music stopped for prayers. they then came down in lengha and we're entertained with some belly dancing.

the event ended with us cousins and auntie (and uncle) dance bollywood style. i think i laughed more than dancing as most of us didn't know how to do indian dance. one cousin was good at it and she taught us how to. but still ... we were just out there for the fun!

during the event one of the minister who was like a family to us, since he spent most of his time at my grandparents' place came. i remembered those old days when he spent time watching football at my gramp's living room and spending overnight at our place. so it's no brainers that we were all asked to say hi to him. i actually had a small talk with him. he asked about my working life in singapore. when i said okay and he said so everything is good i told him that i actually like to complain about something. so funny that he straightaway turned to the minister mode and asked me to tell him what. i complained about how we had to pay the same tax and stuff and yet we don't get the same priviledge. he laughed and of course gave me the known answer - we would like you to become citizen. after knowing that indonesia didn't recognise dual citizenship, he suggested me on being a citizen and indonesian PR. i only smiled though i feel so itchy to say 'no thank you'.

now all is over and i can't wait for next year wear another cousin will go down the aisle.

Clothes Hunting

the wedding is in 2 days and i have no clothes to wear! not after mum firmly said no to my intention on wearing the same punjabi i wore during my sister's wedding last november. none of my clothes fit me and the ghagras she brought just don't attract me - one is dark purple and the other one was a bit kinda old design. okay, yeah i am fussy. after having some discussion it appears that some of my relatives will be following the dress code which is black, white, or pink as well. and the guys are wearing kurthas on saturday! i know my sister and few aunties won't follow that but since i'm thinking of getting one, why not right.
so i went to little india during lunch break. had lunch and went up to the tekka market afterwards. as usual, i am always left clueless after seeing loads and loads of clothes there. i had a difficult time finding one that fits my requirement, black ghagra-simple-with sleeve-not shiny. those that i like either doesn't come in black or too shiny. after walking around in circles several time i decided to bring mum here tomorrow. on my way back to office i stopped at stylemart. i know they cater for the high-end side but i'm just curious on seeing it. the 1st question they asked as soon as i entered the place was if i am the bride. haha, i said no and after giving them my preference she brought me around the place. none to my liking as i want something simple and not shiny. i know ghagra is meant for night time, hence it's difficult to find one that fits my requirement. she then showed me the ready-made saree, in the sense that its already sewn as a skirt and all you need to do is simply wrap the trail across your torso. i tried it and to be honest - i love it! but hey, i wasn't there for saree. ended up looking at the cotton punjabis and of course leaving there empty handed.
oh well... there goes my hunting. worst case, i'll wear whatever i have for saturday and used the ghagra mum brought for sunday. now i can't help but think of the saree and that maroon ghagra.

What If

out of nowhere, without any preparation, not even a plan you have to move from this country. leaving things that you are starting to feel comfortable with behind, to start yet another journey of life?

Burnt!

another round of vb yesterday. weather was okay so i just got a wee bit darker than i already am. i was happy to get a 1-on-1 'guidance' from the girl who used to be in the school team and i think i can safely say yesterday was the best game i had so far. i managed to control the ball and directed it properly. when i was in the game, our so-called 'captain' complemented me on my pass even when i threw it the wrong way, hehe.
it was a nice game. with one guy going back to his country for good, one for few months, while the other one will be away for 2 weeks; even i myself might be skipping it since it's fasting month i felt so very happy being there yesterday. will surely miss the session next week because of the wedding.
and this morning ... i finally did it! one more off the list. went to east coast for the cableskiing this morning. its been donkey years since i did wakeboarding - well i only did it twice anyways - so i decided to stick to kneeboarding today. it was good the 1st time but for the subsequent 2 times i fell straight after i took off. was a bit frustrated because my intention was to upgrade myself to at least 1 wakeboarding before the time's up. i asked the instructor what did i do wrong. after that i managed to get back on track and for the last session, i managed to get myself in between the 2 orange balls and got stopped only when i missed the 3rd one, so i kinda completed 90% of the round. i think i feel more tired from the swimming back to the 'shore' and walked back to the starting place then the cableskiing itself. next time i do it, i'll go straight to the wakeboard. it was raining when i was about to start the session so i skipped applying sunblock. it was scorching hot during the session and then it started raining heavily once i'm done. i'm not going to describe how dark my face and body are. at least i can still be seen at night and what's important is i'm having fun!
now i'm feeling a bit tired after all these and i'm giving myself another 11 minutes to laze around before getting into business. wipe-sweep-mop-scrub-iron. my families are coming to town. yesss!!!