I suck big time when it comes to conversation with someone I admired. Always planned on approaching and start the conversation but always end up with walking out and regret afterwards. Today I plan on approaching wishing a happy new year. But before me approaching, Im the one being approached when I was about to approach another friend of mine. Instead of helping carrying the heavy loads I simply said Happy New Year to you too and continue walking to my friend. Hah! I have to learn to be more vocal here...

another 1/2 day at the office, no one is in the mood to work hard. I personally simply finished what need to be done, sent it to the central team and spend the rest of the time reading, playing sudoku and now blogging.
the next time I'll be online would be 2006 - hopefully Im still given the bless to be alive then. so to all you folks out there, have a great new year ya.

may we strive better in everything we do next year - health, family, work, savings, social life, love, and all other things that we think important for us.
Im going to end my day today by watching a movie, buying some eyeshadow (yeah, thanks to that caucasian lady, I love playing with this now) then head to the gym burning some calories before piling it up again during the end of this festive season.

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2006.

2006 is just around the corner. Lotsa things happened this year, good n bad but all in all its a great year.
healthy lifestyle, weight ups and downs, US trips, new friends, sick families, lost 2 beloved cats, new activities, find peace with myself, new hobbies, and lots of other stuff happened in this year.
Of all the things that happened, one thing that I truly didn't regret is going to Chicos meeting up with new people there which led me to having new friends who I can said kinda brighten my stay here.
Looking forward, a lot of ppl asking me the same question, when r u going to end ur singlehood? when r u going back to ur country? well - for all the questions my answer is the same: I have no idea. Sometimes those questions really frustrates me especially when people (including my own mum) assume that I chose this path of life.
I personally made plans which will not be revealed here 'cos a plan is just a plan and I don't want to share it with anyone (apart from my sisters, of course) until I can see it becoming a reality. So wish me luck in executing my plan. I will try my best to work towards it starting next year..

a great weekend indeed...

It all started with watching KingKong on friday afternoon, mom's arrival at night followed by joining combat class with my fave instructor the following deay. Went out for a party at jave's place before going to another gathering at my uncle's place. It's so funny that we had the gathering on xmas eve some ppl thought we're celebrating it, especially when his neighbour gave us a log cake and wishing us and all. I mean all my aunts are wearing scarf and yet people still thought that we celebrate xmas. Some people are just too ignorant to differentiate stuff.
Went for june's capoeira on sunday and from there i went home preparing for the next day outing.
Yupe, finally outing by the beach came true and a successful one indeed. Me sans my beauty sleep to be there early in the morning, taking over my uncle & kuzzins place 'cos they spent the night there in order to get a good spot was well paid of when the event turned out to be a successful one. Already in line few plans for the next gathering after the breakfast gathering which gonna be held next week. Bowling, pool, chalet - you name it, I'll be there.

Now, back at work yet still feeling sleepy and tired from yesterday but its okay 'cos yesterday was surely a fun day. Even God loves us a lot that He stopped the rain until we pack and went home - that's how bless we were yesterday.
Gonna play it slow this week and might be joining another friend of mine to the NY eve's celebration at Sentosa, just need to get more people that I know to go along.

Im just a happy girl

Went to my uncle's place last night 'cos my cousin from oz is here for holiday with her family. I'm happy cos she remembered I was on a low carb diet when I went to sydney last year, so she bought me packs and packs of lowcarb cadbury chocolate. Though Im no longer on diet, I can now eat it without any guilty feeling.
I'm actually having stomach flu but being on sick leave is out of the question for me, so I just try to ignore the pain by having more chocolate .. yummy.
I should ask ppl who come from australia to bring me this from now on.

I received an email from my sis, basically she's forwarding email she received from 1 of her assistant. Its a very touchy email. Its about this old man they saw in their office, no one notice him sitting alone in the meeting room servicing a typewriter. Imagine how many typewriters are there now, how much is this man's income from such a job in the world where everything is computerized. The email ended up with the writers reflection on herself, how she should be grateful for what she have, that she might be earning much much more compare to this old man.

Reading this email made me feel a bit sad. Sad in the sense that shouldn't I be grateful for all that I have yet sometimes I still whine of something more. When with my earning I can travel around yet I still complain of not having enough money. When I am saving for a louis vuitton wallet, this old man might be saving for his next meal. When Im thinking of my next trip home, having fun with families and school friend, this man might be thinking of whether there is another typewriter need servicing so that he can bag some more money.

And yet I am still ungrateful with all the gift God has given and still giving me...

Current State: Happy

yupe, after stressing out with the oz application, i decided to use another application for the conversion while waiting for IT to resolve the problem. Have been working with the code used by sweden for few days and today I managed to solve the problem. Yaaay - at least the technical part for conversion is settled. Now simply concentrate on HR's applicaion, interface, and datafeeds. Apparently boss put my name for the local test as well - haha, getting more and more huh..
Guess I have to start reading abt this local test while waiting for IT.

Oh ya, just found out that mom's coming one day earlier - haiz.. I actually planned on going to javers place b4 fetching her but now she is here already on that day. But I think this is better 'cos when I told her that I sort of made plans already she simply asked me to go ahead with it 'cos she wanted to spend the day with her siblings - lucky me, I can stay longer than

Bring It On...

Had a very great weekend though sleepy up 'til this moment. Geez, not even a single day passed by without going somewhere after work. But I guess Im ready for the challenge this week has for me - just bring it on.
Another week to endure - can't wait for javer's party this weekend and mom's arrival. Poor mommy, guess I'll be leaving her alone during new year's eve - hey, she's the one asking me to meet people more often (though I know she's referring to different kind of people hehe)

part of my nightmare come true

I've been worrying about being blamed when everything went wrong, and part of it is right. Boss started questioning how come oz's application still not working when we actually received it in sept. I have to explain that yes its september but we can only access it november due to the versioning and then Im also doing HR and fixing the problems at one go. I told her that during the time IT looking at the problem, i focus on gHR which - mind you - has lots of changes now that we're going live with the new release. I guess she totally forgotten there's another project running and Im the sole technical person there.
I've included her in most of our correspondencies so that she's aware of what's happenning n I guess she's not reading it else none of the questions above will be raised.

Even after knowing all the problems Im encountering and the deadline I have for the HR system - I have to change HK's application to cater for the changes - she still gave me additional things thats supposed to be done by others. I know this shows her confidence in me but man, Im only a person with one brain & 2 hands. However good I am in multitasking I still need time to breathe.
Well, time to pack my machines now and go to the other office for presentation, hope I can concentrate with all things in my mind now.

Don't care - Im going to have fun with a good crowd tonight to ease my stress

only in french movies can you find this

*translated in english*
push capitain push capitain ... stop stop capitain ... breathe capitain ...
push capitain push capitain ... stop capitain .. breathe capitain ...
repeat until the baby is born in the middle of a corn field between 5 villages

a bit boring in the beginning but quite funny especially when it's almost at the end of it where all the characters were connected in one way or another - what a movie

Hah ..

I worry for nothing - the problem is again the o/s part. IT's looking at it and now I can be a bit relief.
New joiners orientation gonna be on this friday, this time around its gonna be covered in both location which means I'll be moving around - no total dress down this friday :(

I can't sleep ..

It's midnight and Im still wide awake when I actually plan on waking up early tomorrow for pump. Is it the 1/2 l coke that I had or is it because of my mind can't stop thinking abt work? Probably both.
I've been waking up early during weekend with my heart beating so fast thinking of the problem I'm having. I've been handling too many things at one go that I simply had no time to go into the Oz's application in detail. I've been busy with the presentation and modiying the HR apps now that we have to go live with the new realease that I totally forgotten about it. Until last friday when I was downloading tables for the conversion and hp said that they need to access the conversion flat file soon that I realised some of the programs have problem that none of us knew how to resolve it. Oh No!!
I dunno but I am seriously thinking of asking a shut period from the daily work and all other things for at least 2 days so that I can concentrate on this - I think I really have to consider this.
Even just now when I went back to office I really wanted to bring my notebook home but lucky I had to rush to the gym that I decided not to. Anyway I've been working on saturday and sunday - I need to relax a bit before working again tomorrow. So much for relax when all I can think about when closing my eyes is the error message.

Talk about other things to ease my mind now.
Today was the 1st time I go to the gym on sunday. Its only because MichelleDean was in town and her being in town means Capoeira Fitness! June n Darren did with her - kinda shadowing her for preparation before its launched here. After capoeira june asked me to stay for michelle's hiphop. What the heck! so there I was with my 2 left feet doing hiphop for an hour. Ha3 so darn fun though I really don't have the move. After class, while chitchatting w/ June, kinda giving her feedback on her teaching this guy came and started to ask lotsa question that our chitchat was cut halfway until michelle approached us he was still there. I hung out a while watching michelle n june did some movements, trying to figure out what movement this guy was talking about ;). 7 pm I decided to make a move, did some grocery shopping, cooking before going to bed. I want to go to sleep or I'll miss tomorrow's pump! I really do hope I can shut my eyes soon...

Girl Night In

By the time Im writing this, my friends must've been in the club spending their friday night among friends. I decided to pass on this as I have to go back to work tomorrow, and probably on sunday as well. If I join them I'd definitely leave early and I sorta promise them not to leave early for our next gathering - so I guess I made the right decision.
So here I am at home, doing my laundry while browsing the net and watching cable at the same time. Lucky me, there's a good movie playing on cable now - one of the reason for my quiet night in.

I've been spending more time with myself recently. Like thursdays are the time where I went for dinner by myself after boxercise and take a bus instead of train home. During dinner n my journey home I do lotsa thinking or even dreaming but I find it rather relaxing. I guess sometimes you just need to switch off..

well, what am I rattling here. I think Im gonna logoff now and concentrate on the movie.

Being away from home means being left out in a lot of event, not being able to witness all sort of things happenning back home, and lots of other backfalls.
Today's my elder sis' birthday and I kinda miss seeing the look in my nephew's eyes when he gave present to my sis. I can only imagine it based on the story told by his mom.

This makes me think of all the things - good and bad - that I was not part of back from 1992, the time I stayed in hostel during my uni years.
When I was in uni, I didn't see my cats - milly jr's and d'artagnan's body for the last time. I was not even at home when someone called my mom informing her that my grandpa passed away. When I was in batam, I didn't see my cat, jane (buta)'s body for the last time - only heard that she died under my bed. I could only pray for the best when I heared the news that hercules went missing. Now the Im here, I didn't see Grace, Jimmy and Valentine for the last time as well.

Apart from that, I missed going out with the group for some dinner, pushing the car together when it stalled, sitting together in the living room talking about anything, simply having breakfast and dinner everyday, calling mom asking what's for dinner, just simply hugging my cats when I feel bored or lonely, and lots of other things.
Of course, I don't miss listening to my mum's complain or the traffic back home. But still, I think I miss a lot of family moments being away from home.

And some people really want to be away from home forever...

Getting back on track...

Slowly but surely Im getting back on track - the track I did before though this time not that vigorously.
I started out with getting back to healthy eating, not all the time but I try to make it most of the time and still continue with my workout as and when I can make the time for it. Workout wise, I only do an hour a day - no more no less, no longer the gym crazy girl who attended morning & evening classes 6 times a week.
Its kinda tiring though for the eating part, 'cos you have to plan the meal ahead so you know what to prepare for the next day. I still do my 5 meals a day (sometimes even 6), hence I have to think of the snacks and breakfast - its quite tough especially when you're home late and still have to prepare snacks for the following day. Lunch is the time for me to make a clever choice or be more creative with whats available in the hawker centre.
Yeah, Im doing it slow now - so far Im getting back on track in the weighing dept, slowly but surely. Im aiming for another measurement and inbody check by the end of next week. Im not gonna jeopardize results of my training by totally cutting out certain types of food for a long period as well.

My training is gonna be over next week - from there on I have to do everything on my own. I have to be discipline!! it's for my own good - I can't blame anyone but myself and Im not gonna be someone who's self loathing

Yesterday, we went to the standard chartered marathon, though I participated at the 10 km, it was fun and sort of testing your endurance as well. Woke up early as the run for 10 km started at 7 AM and we have to be there by 6.40. Almost didn't make it as me & hp planned to meet at the gym that I decided to use the shoes in my gym locker. When hp text-ed me saying she'd be late, I tried calling the gym. No answer, so I went back in to check the opening hours. Oh boy, that's a good choice I made. The gym opens at 8 AM on sunday! I quickly called hp as I left my office key at the office, changed my outfit and brought shoes from home. Just imagine if I went there sans my shoes.

The race was fun, we decided not to run fast as we have no preparation at all. We run 'til km 4 then stopped for a drink, brisk walked 'til km 4.5 then run 'til km 7. Walked again 'til km 8 and run until the finish line. Total time is 1 hr 15 mins - not bad :) Each and every participant were given a medal as an appreciation for the participation.
I planned on doing the half marathon next year & hp is fine with it provided we train ourselves. Hehe .. hopefully we do - it is fun to challenge yourself in a positive way.

During the race, I notice a lot of caucasian boys were running with their parents. I like seeing a family engaging in a fun yet positive activities. I personally want my kids (when I have one) to be sporty & active in outdoor activities.

It's Monday again - brand new week, hopefully its a good one. I've been working on this presentation slides for a week, hoping to cover everything as detail as possible since it's going to be a key to our local application changes. Im actually hoping that the partners couldn't attend the presentation as well hehe.. less pressure on me if that happen. We'll see what happens tomorrow. For now, I'll just go back to the writeups.