we belong together - Mariah Carey...

no particular reason for liking this song...
just that because my fave singer, Ricky Martin - has a new release 'I Don't Care' that I end up listening to US radio station, kiis fm that makes me sing this song more.
but US radio station is not that great, they kept on repeating the same song again n again.
well, at least I can hear ricky's song more often :D

===================================================================

I didn't mean it
When I said I didn't love you so
I should have held on tight
I never should've let you go
I didn't know nothing
I was stupid
I was foolish
I was lying to myself
I couldn't have fathomed that I would ever
Be without your love
Never imagined I'd be
Sitting here beside myself

Guess I didn't know you
Guess I didn't know me
But I thought I knew everything
I never felt
The feeling that I'm feeling
Now that I don't
Hear your voice
Or have your touch and kiss your lips
Cause I don't have a choice
Oh, what I wouldn't give
To have you lying by my side
Right here, 'cause baby

[Chorus:]
When you left
I lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe
Come back baby please
We belong together
Who else am I gonna lean on
When times get rough
Who's gonna talk to me on the phone
Till the sun comes up
Who's gonna take your place
There ain't nobody better
We belong together

I can't sleep at night
When you are on my mind
Bobby Womack's on the radio
Singing to me
'If you think you're lonely now
'Wait a minute
This is too deep, too deep
I gotta change the station
So I turn the dial
Trying to catch a break
And then I hear Babyface
I only think of you
And it's breaking my heart
I'm trying to keep it together
But I'm falling apart
I'm feeling all out of my element
I'm throwing things
Crying
Trying to figure out
Where the hell I went wrong
The pain reflected in this song
Ain't even half of what
I'm feeling inside
I need you
Need you back in my life baby

[Chorus]
[Repeat chorus]

When you leftI lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe
Come back baby please
We belong together
Who else am I gonna lean on
When times get rough
Who's gonna talk to me
Till the sun comes up
Who's gonna take your place
There ain't nobody better
We belong together

CaN't MaDe Up My MiNd

Trying to make a decision here, present or future...
quite tough n i really can't decide when actually tomorrow is the deadline.

my training session is gonna be over soon, no significant result after all the money i spent.
actually the trainer was quite upset when she took my measurement yesterday.
lost .5 cm ard the left arm - hey it could be fat rite *grin*

truth be told, Im not happy with the result as well - partly due to my own mistake of not eating enuff.
really need to change my mind set abt eating carbs.

actually i have to start changing my diet *again* starting today - hmm, to think of having the protein shake right after ur workout means that u have to bring the shaker everyday - kinda bulky.
but then if i were to take the shake after workout, when must i take my dinner esp that my workout ends ard 7.30 pm everyday.
late dinner means light dinner - does that mean I have to have a heavy meal before workout - say change my 4.30 snack time as dinner?
then again, what am I suppose to eat for dinner 'cos my snack is mainly fruits n protein bar?
so darn confusing - i still haven't find the right kind of diet for me *the healthy right kind of diet*
- no wonder there's nutritionist everywhere

back to the training...
the trainer wish i continue esp since they're having a loyalty program - cheaper by $7/session BUT you have to take at least 30 sessions...
waaah, this time around Im not gonna take anymore installment plan; I'd rather pay upfront then having to think u're tied to a certain card b'cos of this stupid installment...

this is the hard part - making decision on continuing or not.
of course, the trainer wish i could continue as the training (or should i said 'torturing') she plans for me is actually a 3-mth plan training.
i personally want to continue, as i feel great w/ this eventhough I kinda miss the bodypump class (hehe, anyway i still do it only that my trainer is not aware of this - she's gonna kill me if she knows)

but but,
all these training session and my US trip really use most of my savings.
if i were to take again, there goes my savings .. again.
not sure if this year we'll get a good bonus too

really can't make decision - of course my heart wants me to sign up for more sessions but my mind asks me to rethink abt it again n again....

really dunno :(

for my BELOVED JIMMY

Today I planned to complete one application but as per normal some things get in the way which needs to be entertained first.
Alas, when that is done the mood of completing my application evaporated as well.

These few days Im kinda down as well, what else but because of this bloody stupid fats. It might sound that I fuss a lot abt this, but I know how strict I am to myself before and now that I try to let it loose as ppl are complaining how skinny I was bla bla bla, I felt like I gained fat!!!
Its so darn funny, when all the clothes getting looser n looser but I notice the fat getting more visible. Could it be that my muscle is toner that my body became trimmer n the fats become obvious?
Guess I have to start getting back in track. I've been letting myself loose by eating a family pack of Cadbury at one go which made my trainer gone wild :D.

anyway, Im actually here dedicating this post to one of the beloved guy in my world - JIMMY


I was browsing friendster n decided to add more pics to it. I finally decided to put jimmy's picture.
After uploading it I just kept looking at his face, remembering those days when he's alive.
I couldn't control myself afterwards, I really really miss him so much.

No more eagerness of flying back home n calling him to come home n sleep w me.
No more breathless moment from carrying him - how the vet always ask us to let him go on a diet :)
No more difficulty to move my legs while i'm sleeping at night knowing he's between thr knees n moving around means waking him up as well
No more deep purring from his mouth...

I would never forget that sunday morning, while I was doing my ironing my mobile beep for an incoming message from my dad. Reading the 'inna lillahi wa inna ilaihi roji'un' word he typed, I braced myself to read further and find out which relative passed away.
Oh boy, how was I not prepared to read that the one who passed away was my beloved hunny.
No sickness, nothing at all, not even a news that he's under the weather and here came the message.

9 Sept 1992 - he was borned in my parents closet, the darkest amongst all - the loner, which helped him survived the virus break between his siblings.
How protective he was to his little sister, Milly Snr. that made him the enemy amongst the others as Milly was so mischevious n he always defended his sister from other cats.
How eagerly he was waiting for his food - how special he was that he's always given more portion than the rest of the cat.
How delightful I was knowing that he started to get along w other cats when he's getting older - no longer the loner that he used to be.

Jimmy - my hunny bunny, ur pic is here in my office, at home, in my machine n everywhere...
really miss u much - especially today.

9 sept '92 - jan'05

yupe - 3 weeks has passed by and Im still having the cough.

went back to my hometown where I met my family n my lovely cuddly nephew.
I guess he really wanted me to remember him when Im back here, thats why he passed his cough n flu to me.
Is it my immunity system that bad that I havent recovered up til today? I dunno...
I dont think so actually, knowing how actively engaged I am to sports.

Anyway, ppl say that fat boosts immunity system -- does this mean my fat level is down?
hmmm I really really hope so :)

went back to my normal life - again, I missed the launches of combat, pump, n balance. Tried my best to catch up but this stupid cough made it difficult
Alas, I only do few times of combat, pump n balance - thank god Combat 24 is not that great in a sense that the movement is realllly like 21. But hats down for the songs though - 2 BonJovis n 1 RickyMartin.

I really love coming back here n back to do combat - did once in Jakarta which was quite disappointing - there's no muay thai!! what is combat w/o that rite?!?

talking abt combat makes me talk abt my favourite instructor :)
went to orchard branch last saturday 'cos he's covering a class there.
I was quite exhausted that day - still under the weather n forgotten to bring water.
During the few seconds break he said that he noticed the energy level was decreasing n asked us to increase it. Apparently he was looking at me while saying that so I had to nod my head n really increased my intensity level. Wow, I shouted n shouted n felt like fainting afterwards. But its definitely a great workout n my way of showing support to this favourite instructor of mine...

hmmm....
called my nephew few days ago n he said that he loooooooooooooove me so much n wanted to follow me here.
I said 'cannot' n he said 'must, i wanna follow'.
he is so cute, n being just 3.5 yrs old he doesnt know what must means so he kept using that words.
Its just so funny hearing his cute little voice insists on something by saying the word 'must'.
speaking of him just makes me wanna make a call n talk to him now.